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Wednesday, December 20, 2023

When Fashion Turns Hazardous

Ever thought your outfit could be the death of you? I'm not talking about those 'killer' looks that make you the envy of every party. No, I mean literally, fashion that could send you to an early grave. Sounds like a Tim Burton movie plot, right? Well, fasten your seatbelts (and pray they're not laced with lead) because we're diving into the fashion history archives where style was a matter of life and death!

Via Pexels

Beware the Killer Crinoline

First up, the crinoline, a.k.a. the hoop skirt. Picture this: it's the 1850s, and you want to make a statement at the town ball. You don a steel-caged skirt, voluminous enough to make any Victorian lady swoon. But whoops! You just turned into a mobile fire hazard. These skirts were notorious for catching fire, making an elegant entrance more like a dramatic, flaming exit. It's not the kind of 'lit' anyone wants to be.

Going Green? More Like Going Gone!

Victorian fashionistas had a thing for vibrant green dresses. But here's the twist: that gorgeous green hue came from arsenic! Yep, dresses, wallpapers, and even kiddie toys were slathered in this toxic stuff. Wearing a green gown was like saying, "I may look fabulous, but I'm also flirting with the Grim Reaper." If someone complimented your 'killer' dress back then, they might have meant it literally.

The Squeeze of Death: The Corset Chronicles

Moving on to corsets, the ultimate waist-whittlers. These things were tighter than a packed subway at rush hour. They squished organs, made breathing a luxury, and sometimes cracked ribs. Who knew achieving that hourglass figure was a full-contact sport? In the quest for the perfect silhouette, Victorian women braved fainting spells and the occasional rib popping out of place. Talk about commitment to fashion! It's like wearing a boa constrictor and calling it haute couture.

Mad Hatters and Mercury Mayhem

Hats off (literally) to the 19th-century hatters who used mercury in hat-making. This not-so-brilliant idea led to trembling, slurred speech, and even hallucinations. Ever wonder why the Mad Hatter in 'Alice in Wonderland' was, well, mad? Thank the mercury!

Sky-High Heels, Sky-High Risks

Jump to more recent times, and we've got high heels. These stiletto skyscrapers aren't just a challenge to walk in; they're an orthopedic surgeon's nightmare. Sprains, fractures, and a parade of podiatric problems. It's all fun and games until you're hobbling home with more than just sore feet.

Fashion's Eco-Friendly Hero

But don't despair, dear readers, for not all fashion is a death sentence. Today, brands like DESO at are revolutionizing the scene with a safe, sustainable style. Their eco-friendly threads are proof that fashion can be both fabulous and kind to our planet. So, while we giggle over the ghastly fashion gaffes of yesteryears, let's also tip our non-mercury-laden hats to those making a positive impact.

So, next time you're dressing to impress, just be thankful your biggest worry is probably a fashion faux pas, not a literal fashion fatality. Stay snazzy, stay safe, and most of all, stay alive in those killer outfits!

photo aubrey-sig_zps0ck6qpqn.png

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